Yaoi: Not for everyone... but definitely for me.

"Yaoi (/ˈjaʊi/; Japanese: やおい, Japanese: [ja.o.i]), also known as Boys' Love (BL), is a Japanese genre of fictional media focusing on romantic or sexual relationships between male characters, typically aimed at a female audience and usually created by female authors." Or so says Wikipedia.... or from South Park's Wendy: 

A good basic Yaoi 101 video.

                              These next three pieces are by my favorite artist: Yamane Ayano

Extremely sexual (at times bordering on non-con/relunctance)

Sometimes silly (cause big bad mobster with stuff animal is adorbs)

The art is stunning

My first YaoiCon was in 2010... I traveled from China to San Fran to meet the incredible Yamane Ayano and got to spend time with some wonderful friends I'd met via the community.

The above video pointed out some of criticism directed at this genre: focusing on troupes, not having the characters come out as gay (which means there's no dealing with prejudices in society), not addressing bisexuality, stereotypical roles and treating the subject like a fetish. (LUBE! Reality people: USE LUBE!)

Ignoring the fact that this tradition comes from Asia where public affection is rarely seen (until recently) and sexuality isn't something to be discussed, many still draw/write in a way that honors the 'rules' of the genre but that's not always the case.

Many yaoi novels do actually address some of these issues. (I ADDRESS these issues! Other yaoi authors I read address these issues) So I believe Yaoi is changing with the times.

But I'd like to suggest we look past what we see on the surface: fans fawning over prettiness. Because the bigger question is WHY are fans so drawn and affected on almost a primal level to Yaoi?

I believe Yaoi helps some (not all) fans come to terms with their gender identity and their own sexuality. Yaoi characters explore their sexual expression in graphic detail therefore pushing the societal boundaries allowing more safe space for fans to figure out who they are. (Possibility the lack of pushing labels onto the characters allow the readers/fans to explore who they are and what they like without having to deal right away with changing a label >>> btw accepting a different gender label or orientation can take time and it's not instant.)

In some cases with the people I've talked to it allows them to reconnect to their own sexuality albeit through a backdoor. (Yeah I went there!) Society can be oppressive in the way sexuality is dealt or not. Yaoi allows distance so the fan/reader can explore/process without immediate backlash to allow full discovery.

At times I don't find it much different than gay romance though maybe a bit more over the top plots and an adherence to top/bottom relationship structure.

I LOVE Yaoi fans because they are the happiest and least judgmental group of people I've ever met.   Thank you for never slut shaming me for my likes/interests.

Here's where I'll be Sept 15-18:    YaoiCon 

Big hugs, Z.