Thursday, May 14, 2015

And They Lived Happily Ever After...

Happily Ever Afters have been my drug of choice for years...




Rape. Death. Cancer. Abject Loneliness. Suicidal thoughts accompanied by very specific plans of how to exit. Anxiety so bad it paralyzed me...

When this was my existence I fucking grabbed for happy with both hands any place I could find it.

Romance books became my happy... a balm for my devastated soul... reading the troupes of the well worn patterns was like mediation chant but each unique. I know (unlike real life) everything in that world is going to be okay. Sure there's going to be some ick the characters are going to have to go through but they will be together and happy in the end. I'll get to fall in love as the story unwinds. The pain they experienced will be forgotten as I get to their happily ever after their fight/their struggle will have been worth it  >>> allowing me the reader of a wonderfully crafted love fest just a moment... a space in time where everything is going to be alright for me too. 

I've had people shake their fingers at me (literally) for reading only happily ever afters as if pure romance was somehow less than other works of fiction.

But life is too fucking short not to be happy. When I'm laying in a machine trying hard not to cry because I don't know what this million dollar body scan will find... happily ever afters have kept me sane. When my anxiety is making me crazy I acknowledge it and then wonder about what character x will do if character y does Z and allow myself the brief respite from the crazy that threatened to pull me down into the depths of despair. Happily ever afters work (for me) better than sedatives.

Romance books with happily ever afters make me happy. When I'm happy I can make other people happy. I know some people thrive on those 'meaningful bitter sweet endings' or fiction or biographies or the huge variety of terrific books that are out there.. That's awesome. I'm happy for them and have no need to convert them to an all happy ending lifestyle.

As a reader I invest time and money into what I want to experience.

As a writer I write ONLY happily ever afters.

People tend to point out romance isn't realistic...

So? I mean really... SO?

That's kinda of the point of this genre for me. If the story was realistic and could pass for real life I think it slips out of the romance genre and into something I don't read or write. I'm looking for an out of my reality. I want to be swept away on the magic of dreams.

Once I had someone point out I just needed to be educated... so I could learn to appreciate a variety of books.

I wonder what he meant by that?  I have a three bachelor's degrees (Psychology, English & Philosophy) and a master's in Psychology. But reading the hundreds of books I did to get those degrees isn't what he meant by education. He wanted me to read non-happy endings until I would be forced to like it... um why?  (cognitive dissonance aside) not even the master of my heart would attempt to make that suggestion. (I'd walk over broken glass bare for him)

Someone could easily say some of my characters aren't realistic.

(I could give the snarky SO? answer but I won't I'll go with disbelief) My characters aren't realistic? What gave it away? Was it my cock sucking zombies or my hot rockers playing Truth Or Dare leading to all out orgies?

I usually write in a Yaoi-style. (Yes I capitalize it because it's like a religion to those who practice it). Yaoi is over the top, fluffy yummy smexy goodness but you won't be able to pry it from my hands. It's what in my head.

Happily ever afters are what dances between me and all the shadows that linger. Take the happily ever afters away from me and I don't think you'd like what you find.

Given the choice between realism or a happily ever afters... which do you think I'm going with?

What's your preference my Pretty ones?

I wish you all love, happiness and romance always.

Hugs, Z.

1 comment:

  1. My rainbow reader series is a chronological timeline of sexual discovery and awakening. True to life experiences in a repetitive, almost circular destructive pattern. The true sense of insanity. As the timeline continues offering hope of a HEA, the novels begin as life starts over for the main character. Then sparks begin to fly. Georgie and Warren meet, and a whole new world begins, but is there a HEA? The 3rd Moments in Time: Innocence introduced Warrens side of the story of life before Georgie, their first encounter, and life as it evolved together. Happily Ever Afters aren't a guarantee in real life, and even though the reader wants to escape from their reality into a fictional romantic Happily Ever After, they are going to have to experience the rainbow, and enjoy the story as it evolves and unfolds. Perhaps I do not write Gay fiction. I write Gay reality. But as a new writer, I hope that my writing continues to evolve. *hugs*