Thursday, June 22, 2017

A sadist, a Dom and a sub walk into a club…


Wait, were you waiting for a punchline? That’s what happens in a chapter opening.

Secured and Free is the second book in the Entwined Dreams BDSM series. Entwined is a BDSM club that doesn’t exist except in my wishes and dreams. I began writing this as a way to ensure all types of BDSM expression are validated not just the “typical”. My goal is to explore the faucets of what’s beyond what we normally see/read about. There’s too much complexity and uniqueness for me not to want to share what’s beyond the stereotypes. Be warned you might not find characters you’re used to seeing or expressing themselves in the way you might come to expect.

(Disclaimer: I’m a love slave. So, I approach BDSM on a very personal level. I try to acknowledge my own filters, but I may slip into my own belief system >>> if you feel I’m not be portraying an aspect accurately please let me know.)

I believe BDSM is a spectrum. Some people live in BDSM based relationships 24/7, others dabble and there’s people everywhere in between. Sometimes people remain fixed in their BDSM needs and desires over time, sometimes their desires change. BDSM is truly individual. As is the expression of it.

Take the two Doms in Secured and Free: Marcus Satir and Hunter Dixon. Both can wear the label Dominant. However, their expression of it is different. Marcus finds his joy in sharing pain with others, and Hunter wants to guide a sub to their full potential. Hunter is very specific and exacting while Marcus finds the joy of BDSM to the point of being silly. Hunter is thrilled to go over a BDSM activities worksheet with a sub while Marcus wouldn’t waste his time (though he has no problem using the information acquired). Their perceptions of themselves and their definitions of domination also vary.


Excerpt from Secured and Free: Marcus, Hunter and Orion’s first chat:

Hunter nodded. “I simply like to put a sub through their paces. I like to focus on making sure they are getting everything they need.”

Did Orion shiver? Marcus couldn’t be sure because of the squirming in the chair. He might as well throw his predilection out there. “I’m a sadist.”

Shaking his head, Hunter said, “You’ve got sadistic tendencies.”

Marcus rolled his eyes. “Fine! Sadistic tendencies with a side of masochism. I like to make it hurt and share the feelings.”

Orion gasped and panted a little. The Pain Slut sign flashed over his head.

Encouraged that he was on the right track, Marcus continued to fuel the fire. “I live for the moment when the pain morphs into pleasure.” He took the strands of hair dyed purple and painted them over Orion’s face. “I adore the sensation so much I want to share in the bounty of pain... the intensity of it.”

The pretty man shut his mouth and swallowed.

Hallelujah! The three of them would be well matched if Marcus could make this happen. “But Hunter’s not into needles or pain. I’m not what most would consider a Dominant, because I adore the sting of pain, but no matter how I try, I can’t be submissive enough to satisfy Hunter’s need for dominance.”

Marcus took in Orion’s rapid blinking and the way he licked his full lips. Yeah, Marcus had gotten used to settling for a lot less to get just a little of what he needed. With Orion, it wouldn’t be reconciling himself to less... and to share in Hunter’s complete satisfaction would be heaven.



The practice/lifestyle of BDSM done right can be a magical. Done wrong… it can lead to unintended injury both physical and mental. Be safe. Be happy. Be you.

Big Hugs, Z. Allora




Entwined Dreams: Book Two
An abusive Dom robbed Orion Gordon of his love of BDSM, destroying his confidence and leaving him unsure he’ll ever find peace through submission to another. Still, deep inside, his longing continues. 
Marcus Sadir loves Hunter Dixon, yet can’t be the one thing Hunter truly desires: a sub to control. And Hunter can’t find satisfaction in the sadistic aspects of the BDSM lifestyle, while Marcus thrives on inflicting and sharing pain. When Marcus convinces Hunter they should find a third on a permanent basis, they discover Orion might be the key to bridging their differences and joining them on a deeper level. 
But they must help Orion move past his trauma enough for him to enjoy new facets of BDSM and kink again. Their journey toward becoming whole—together—won’t be without challenges. Can Orion trust enough to try again?

BUY LINKS:
ebook:  https://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/books/secured-and-free-by-z-allora-8511-b
paper:  https://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/books/secured-and-free-by-z-allora-8512-b

Thursday, June 15, 2017

BDSM CURES


Cue the eye roll... Stay with me Pretty ones.

BDSM DOESN'T CURE EVERYTHING, BUT IT DOES HAVE BENEFITS WHICH CAN PROMOTE HEALING.
(as always results will vary based on individual differences)

1) Some people use BDSM as a break.
There's no thinking/worrying/obsessing when you hit deep subspace. You're completely in the moment. At times, it can be an almost meditative state (comparable to yoga).
Top & subspace or the flow as some refer to it reduces stress hormones.

>>> In Secured and Free, Orion has decided to give up BDSM and one of the things he misses the most is this altered state where one lives only in the present moment.
 
2) BDSM can release endorphins. Endorphins regulate pain, stress, and cravings.
>>> In Secured and Free, Marcus uses a bit of torment to help Orion through his anxiety even discussing BDSM. One of the ways to get through anxiety is alternate stimulation.
Excerpt Marcus’s Cock Therapy:
“Oh God! Marcus!” Orion’s head hit the back of the sofa.
Marcus spread the wetness from the tip all over Orion’s cock. “God Marcus... that has a ring to it.”
He could be developing the first ever cock therapy. Imagine all the difficult issues people could deal with as he tormented their dicks. Nah, he liked the two dicks he had to tease.

3) BDSM strengthens bonds between couples.
There was a study published a few years ago that suggested BDSM couples "felt more secure in their relationships, and had an increased sense of well-being. They were more conscientious toward others, more extraverted, more open to trying new experiences, had decreased anxiety, and were less sensitive to others perception. Interestingly, they were also more aware of their own sexual needs but less agreeable. ((http://sexualhealth.about.com/od/sextherapy/ss/The-Health-Benefits-of-BDSM.htm))


 I do believe the troupe of BDSM healing all is based in reality (at least in my experience and opinion).

In Secured and Free, during a submeeting a member explains how the use of a bracelet that can be turned into cuffs is helping her deal with her extreme shyness.


This is a simple bracelet... but for someone with anxiety it can remind them of the calm they experience when secured with rope as well as give them some of the benefits BDSM has been shown to give.



And if the bracelet isn't enough of a reminder they open up into sturdy cuffs.
They come in various colors and designs.  I worked with a charming man who custom made these for me. His website is:
Leather Wood Studios

This is an excerpt from Secured and Free’s submeeting. Orion has given up on BDSM. A violation stole the trust he needed to have to do a scene. After meeting Hunter and Marcus, Orion longs to find a way back to BDSM...

Excerpt from Secured and Free:
Circling the room before taking his seat, Zack said, “I’d like to invite Erin to share.”
“Erin’s here?” “Erin’s going to speak?” and variations on the question made its way around the room. Applause broke out when she took the floor. She grinned. “Yes, Erin is here, and I wanted to share.” Erin, a collared submissive who Orion rarely heard speak above a whisper and who usually hid behind her wealth of red hair, had more confidence than he remembered.
Erin rubbed two fingers across a red leather bracelet decorated with a grouping of three black hearts. “Most of you know about my severe anxiety.”
Her anxiety kept her out of most play parties, sub meetings, and demonstrations because she couldn’t handle the stimulation of a crowd. Seeing her stand and speak to about fifty subs in attendance was nothing short of miraculous.
Throwing her wavy hair over her shoulders, she said, “I don’t think I’ve found a cure for anxiety or anything, but I found assistance.”
Most subs leaned forward.She held out her braceleted wrist. “This is my secret weapon.” Ross squinted. “A bracelet? It’s pretty and all, but—”
“It’s actually cuffs.” She stepped over to Zack. “Would you please?”
 “Of course.” Zack unsnapped the leather, opened the bracelet into two bands of leather, and then resnapped the circles so a loop wrapped around each wrist.
Erin held up her hands, which were now cuffed, and tugged. “Now I know everyone views things differently. Some people see bondage as....”
“Sexy and hot.”“Punishment,” a newbie called out.“Allowing the sub’s beauty to be displayed, and a way of creating living art,” Zack, who was one of the best in Japanese erotic bondage, added.
Erin nodded. “It’s different for everyone. For me, when my Mistress and Master put me in bondage, it’s like a day at the spa.”
Orion blocked out the envy and the wishes of his rope-laden fantasies. He’d heard tales of Hunter’s prowess with suspension work. Oh, the positions—stop!
He refocused on Erin. “As soon as the ropes start to wrap around me, I relax. I trust Mistress Jess and Master Ralph will take care of everything, and I can just be.”
Sam grinned. “So how does the magic bracelet work?”
Erin giggled. “It’s not magic, but wearing it allows me to access a bit of that calm I experience when in bondage. Each morning my Mistress and Master will call me over to them and put the bracelet on me. They both tell me to remember I’m loved and safe.” She shrugged. “I’ve been able to do more and more stuff that my anxiety used to stop me from doing.”
“The bracelet puts you in subspace?” Sam asked.
Orion had gotten tiny tastes of subspace while having Hunter and Marcus sex him up.
“Um... not really... maybe.... It lets me remember that heavenly place and gives me a relaxed feeling. Even though I’m still nervous standing here. Talking to a group was never something I’d have done ever before.”
“Where did you get it?” Orion didn’t realize he’d asked a question until Xander’s intake of breath threatened to draw all the air in the room out, and his stare was burning a hole into Orion.
“They’re starting to sell them at Entwined’s store. Again, I don’t think they’re magic. It’s just something that helps me. And I wanted to share.” She smiled at Zack and held out her wrists. “Please. Thank you.”
People wanting to touch the bracelet and ask questions circled her. Xander leaned in. “Do you want one of those? Would that help?”
“I’m not sure.” But after this weekend, Orion might be willing to try. He pushed away ashes of suspension work he’d seen in the past. His craving to have Hunter tie him while Marcus tormented him in a delicious way rode him hard. There had to be a way for him to get there.
 
Entwined Dreams: Book Two
An abusive Dom robbed Orion Gordon of his love of BDSM, destroying his confidence and leaving him unsure he’ll ever find peace through submission to another. Still, deep inside, his longing continues. 
Marcus Sadir loves Hunter Dixon, yet can’t be the one thing Hunter truly desires: a sub to control. And Hunter can’t find satisfaction in the sadistic aspects of the BDSM lifestyle, while Marcus thrives on inflicting and sharing pain. When Marcus convinces Hunter they should find a third on a permanent basis, they discover Orion might be the key to bridging their differences and joining them on a deeper level. 
But they must help Orion move past his trauma enough for him to enjoy new facets of BDSM and kink again. Their journey toward becoming whole—together—won’t be without challenges. Can Orion trust enough to try again?



BUY LINKS:
ebook:  https://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/books/secured-and-free-by-z-allora-8511-b
paper:  https://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/books/secured-and-free-by-z-allora-8512-b


Many people take issue with the idea BDSM can heal. That’s fine… for some people maybe it can’t assist them, but I’ve used aspects of BDSM in my day to day life and have found it makes me happier and healthier. Did it solve my problems? No, but the practice gave me a break from anxiety, and in some cases the courage and strength to deal with issues in a more productive way. Again, everyone’s different.
Many Hugs,
Z. Allora

Thursday, June 1, 2017

Children on Gender by NatGeo




Gender definitions are morphing... people are identifying in different ways.
Hugs, Z.












Thursday, May 25, 2017

Polyamorous vs Cheating SECURED AND FREE

 Cheating is a violation.

Polyamorous/Open relationships should be negotiated and it's agreed upon by all parties to have more partners in the relationship.



Here's three boyfriends discussing the glory of their polyamorous relationship.


Here's two men discussing their feelings of never wanting to be in an open relationship.



Hugs, Z.

Thursday, May 18, 2017

10 Genders Beyond Male & Female


My heart is too sore to give you commentary. It is my hope you'll explore and think beyond the binary male & female... This video may have some new information for you.
Hugs, Z. 



Thursday, May 11, 2017

The Science of The Kiss


Secured and Free 
Orion is a researcher. He believes in objective facts. Love is simply an imbalance of chemicals.
Here's a video on The Science of The Kiss.
Enjoy!



I'd also recommend once a day to give your love(s) a mindful conscious kiss. It will help remind them and you why you're together.
Hugs, Z.

Thursday, April 27, 2017

How Female Orgasm Works

Do what feels good... not what you think should feel good.
Feel your imagination (Read romance... Z. Allora might have a few one hand reads...)



Hugs, Z.