5 Embarrassing Sexual Type Situations for Anyone…
Other than Z. Allora
Thank you so much for having me. I’m going to share with you
5 situations that could have been embarrassing… but I’m Z. Allora so I embraced
them. I’m not saying I’ve never been embarrassed by sex or sexual situations,
but it gives me much more joy to embrace sex and sexuality. Then I’m going to
celebrate my new release The Longest Night, a sweet BDSM with
a giveaway.
Here are 5 situations
that could have been mortifying if I let them:
1) Bangkok Go-Go Bar: “I fuck him too.”
On one of our trips to Bangkok, we were at
a go-go bar and the bouncer placed us right in front of the stage. The dancers
took great pleasure in dedicating themselves to me. As the only person who was
assigned female at birth in attendance, their goal was to embarrass me with
attention….
Although once they realized that was a
hopeless endeavor, they began to try to make me laugh. One sweet dancer decided
making silly faces was the way to go.
He was right! I snortled again and again at
his twisted fish lips face.
Later that evening, Mr. Alpha, the biggest,
most muscular dancer that everyone doted on, directed his attentions to me.
He strutted his fine, oiled muscular body over
to me. Stopping in front of me, he raked his gaze over me as if trying to start
a fire with no tinder.
After a moment of intense study, he announced
with a confident smile, “I fuck you.”
*** All kidding aside, it was a lovely and
thoughtful offer. It was clearly a coveted gift based on the reactions of the pouting
of the patrons losing out on his attentions. ***
I shook my head, and elbowed my love. “I’m
sorry, I’m with him.”
My love had stopped playing his game and
smiled at the man in the loin cloth offering to fuck me. (Clearly my dearest heart
knew there was no threat whatsoever.)
Mr. Alpha glanced at my love and grinned.
He turned back to me and nodded. “I fuck him too.”
“Oh, thank you, but no. We’re good.” I
didn’t want to insult him but I needed to be clear since I spoke only a few
words of Thai.
*** This little scene had gotten everyone’s
attention. The group on stage stopped dancing to stare at I’m sure what was a
rare sight… Mr. Alpha being told “no.” ***
Mr. Alpha stared deeply into my eyes. “You
very good. I make better.”
Thankfully, the bouncer at the door flashed
a light signaling to the dancers that the police would soon be raiding the
establishment.
Everyone darted away.
Mr. Alpha gave me one last longing look and
ran out into the back.
My love and I beat a hasty retreat out the door.
2) The movers found handcuffs under our bed.
Mover: “Oh Mrs. Lady. Mrs. Lady. I found
something of yours.”
I dash into the bedroom to find him
smirking with an old pair of handcuffs, that had gotten lost under the bed,
dangling from his fingertips. His intent was to embarrass or shame me.
Z.: “Oh God! Thank you so much! We’ve been
looking for these.” I snatch them with a smile and clutch them to my chest.
“These were my very first pair.”
Mover: Turns red, nods, and backs into a
wall.
3) Carpet cleaner sucks up my bondage rope in
his vacuum.
Cleaner: “Um, a… there’s some sort of rope
attached under your bed.”
Z.: “Oh, yeah. Sorry, I must not have
tucked it in when we were done…. But it’s still easier than tying it each time.
Am I right?”
Cleaner: …..
4) “I’ve never been hit in the head with a
penis… until today.”
Carpet cleaner (same one, different visit):
Upstairs in that room with all the pictures on the wall (which is cover art
from my books)….
Z.: Yes. (Not sure where he’ll go with
this…)
Carpet Cleaner: “Well, until today I’ve
never been hit in the head with a penis….”
Z.: “Oh, my. Are you okay?”
Carpet Cleaner: “Yeah, I just… didn’t
expect it. Why do you have one hanging in there?”
Z.: (mentally rubbing my hands together)
Well, that’s a tintinnabulum from Pompeii. Where shop owners would hang these
penises with bells attached to bring good luck to the store.”
Carpet Cleaner: nods… “Okay, so I guess I was
hit in the head with good luck.”
5) Flying with Sex Toys
TSA: “What is this?” He points to
my case of vibrators with a smirk.
Z.: “Vibrators. Would you like to
see how I use them?”
TSA: (smirk falters) ….
Z.: “You put them on either side of
your temple. If you have a cold use them around your nose to break up
congestion, and to help with sinus pressure.”
TSA: ….
Z.: “There are other uses as well.”
(bats eyelashes) “Orgasms.”
TSA: “You’re fine. Go.”
Z.: “I can show you—”
TSA: “Next.”
Not only accepting who you are but embracing yourself is a
joy all it’s own. My characters in The Longest Night have finally
accepted who they are and are clear on what they want. They are no longer
willing to settle.
The Longest Night
The holiday season is lonely for construction worker
Benjamin Morgan, a big muscular guy who just wants to submit, obey, and serve.
But the men he’s attracted to usually don’t have a dominant bone in their bodies.
He’s done seeking his BDSM dreams with someone who isn’t interested in putting
him in his rightful place—on his knees at their feet.
When a friend sets
up a meeting with Foster Ridgeway at the BDSM club, Entwined, Benjamin has his
doubts. Of course he is attracted to bookish Foster, who works
for the same construction company, but how will someone so small and
delicate-looking master Benjamin? But when Foster--the tiny temple of dominance
wielding a crop--heads toward Benjamin, he might get what he’s always wanted,
just in time for Solstice.
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