BDSM & Playing with Stereotypes

Our brains are hardwired in ways unique to us. Things that might not turn on most people can make us boil over. The key is finding those little triggers in yourself and in your partner and setting them off when there’s time to explore… or not if you’re into delayed gratification.

Sometimes words are all a Dom/Master needs to make a sub surrender everything. But as always the Master/Dom should be concerned with the sub’s well-being both physically and emotionally.

I’d like to share an exclusive excerpt from The Longest Night with you. In this scene Foster and Benjamin just spent the night together loving each other and playing with impact play. Keep in mind Benjamin is a muscular construction worker who has no interest in topping… which is why top is his safeword.

Excerpt:

Foster’s mouth dropped open. “Wait. Benjamin, what are you wearing?”

“Um, an apron.” Looking down at the frilly white ruffles, he was in such a rush, he hadn’t taken it off. Shit!

“Turn,” Foster demanded with a twirl of his finger.

Benjamin could feel his cheeks heat, but as he did a slow spin, he clutched the tray tighter, like that would help cover his backside or make Foster’s inspection less embarrassing.

“Aw, come here. Is your safeword still top, my sweet boy?” Foster waved him closer to the bed.

“Yes, Master.” Benjamin set the tray on the night table and lowered his eyes. His dick tented the front of the apron.

Foster turned him so he faced away from him. “Bend over a bit. I want to retie your satin ribbon. Mmmm, your bottom is still all red.”

Closing his eyes, he savored Foster’s hands cupping his ass. His breath caught as Foster started tracing the edges of the apron.

His fingers highlighted the fact Benjamin’s ass was completely exposed. “I adore how the bow is right above your ass. Just like a pretty little present for me to unwrap.”

“Yes, Master.” Totally ready to go, he would be up for anything. The anticipation throbbed into his straightening dick.

Truth be told, there was something Benjamin found hot about wearing anything slightly feminine. His muscles made gender-bending with frilly clothing somehow forbidden, and anything taboo registered high on his horny scale.

Foster rubbed Benjamin’s sore ass. “As intoxicating as you are, I need to feed you, and—”

He turned to reassure Foster. “No, I’m good. We can—”

“Excuse me?” Foster gave him a half smile with the arched eyebrow of you did not just say that.

Oops, Benjamin blew it. “I’m sorry, Master.”

“Benjamin, my first priority as your Master will always be your well- being.” Foster teased a hand over the front of Benjamin’s apron. “Though I assure you, I endeavor to address all your needs.”

His breath caught on an inhale. “Yes, Master.”

Foster reached behind Benjamin and slapped his ass.

“Mmmm, ow.” Benjamin moaned more than complained. The smack set off a chain reaction of memory arousal and submission.

An amused glint in Foster’s eyes as well as the tent he made with the sheet, told Benjamin his Master enjoyed this breakfast-in-bed scenario as much as he did. “But no matter how enchanting I find you in ruffles and satin ribbon, we can’t let this delicious food get cold.”

They totally could. No problem to reheat— Obey. “Yes, Master.” Foster patted Benjamin’s ass.

“But I do think we need to add some heat to your ass... after breakfast.” He tossed one of the pillows on the floor. The apron brushed tantalizingly across Benjamin’s erection, making him bite back a moan as he kneeled on the cushion and opened the legs of the tray without spilling the coffee. He set the meal over Foster’s lap, right over the erection that begged for Benjamin’s attention.

((The most innocent things can take on new meanings that have the ability to create very powerful and sexy results. Benjamin will never look at his apron the same way again.))

The Longest Night Blurb:

The holiday season is lonely for construction worker Benjamin Morgan, a big muscular guy who just wants to submit, obey, and serve. But the men he’s attracted to usually don’t have a dominant bone in their bodies. He’s done seeking his BDSM dreams with someone who isn’t interested in putting him in his rightful place—on his knees at their feet.

When a friend sets up a meeting with Foster Ridgeway at the BDSM club, Entiwned, Benjamin has his doubts. Of course he is attracted to bookish Foster, who works for the same construction company, but how will someone so small and delicate-looking master Benjamin? But when Foster--the tiny temple of dominance wielding a crop--heads toward Benjamin, he might get what he’s always wanted, just in time for Solstice.

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Validation through Humiliation

“One important respect in which humiliation differs from embarrassment is that, whereas we bring embarrassment upon ourselves, humiliation is something that is brought upon us by others.” Neel Burton M.D. wrote The Psychology of Humiliation Aug 27, 2014 for Psychology Today.

In The Longest Night Benjamin is waiting for Foster’s arrival. Foster is not there at the set time. What takes this to the level of humiliation is everyone in the club witnesses Benjamin’s long wait because he’s doing so while on his needs. If no one was aware of Benjamin’s wait it may have only registered as annoyance at the “lateness” but everyone knows it.

Exclusive Excerpt from The Longest Night:

At 6:45, Benjamin stood next to last night’s table. A reserved sign and a digital clock rested there. A shiver of need passed through him at Foster’s forethought to make these arrangements.

This was on.

He dropped to his knees and adjusted his position. When happy with his display, he settled in to wait.

The hardness of the carpeted floor kept him centered on his purpose— to please Foster. Time ticked by as Benjamin reveled in the knowledge that Foster told him to do something and he submitted to the demand.

Members of Entwined gave him a wide berth, but he could feel their eyes on him. Some must wonder who he waited on. Was Foster watching him? He straightened his spine a little more.

He glanced at the clock—7:01 and no Foster. Maybe he wasn’t a Dom who was into being exact about time.

Another check—7:07. Benjamin’s knees were beginning to ache. The pain turned him on.

Still no Foster—7:13. Had Foster decided he didn’t want to do this? Maybe Benjamin wasn’t pleasing enough? Should he go?

Every second seemed like an hour and every minute a day.

At 7:16, doubt ate at him. Where was Foster? What had Benjamin done wrong?

When 7:20 arrived, Benjamin decided he’d wait all fucking night if he had to. He’d be worthy of Foster. If Foster wanted to test him, make him suffer, embarrass him, whatever Foster wanted, Benjamin would do. He’d earn the right to go into the back room and bend over for Foster.

At 7:23, his cock decided to lengthen in anticipation of all the delicious things Foster might do to him... or might not.

At 7:30….

**********

In this scene, we can see how embarrassment turns into humiliation and then morphs into reinforcement as Benjamin settles in. If and when Foster shows up Benjamin’s humiliation might turn into joyful celebration for overcoming humiliation. The entire scene of enduring humiliation might reinforce and validate him as a submissive.

Here’s the blurb to The Longest Night.

The holiday season is lonely for construction worker Benjamin Morgan, a big muscular guy who just wants to submit, obey, and serve. But the men he’s attracted to usually don’t have a dominant bone in their bodies. He’s done seeking his BDSM dreams with someone who isn’t interested in putting him in his rightful place—on his knees at their feet.

When a friend sets up a meeting with Foster Ridgeway at the BDSM club, Entiwned, Benjamin has his doubts. Of course he is attracted to bookish Foster, who works for the same construction company, but how will someone so small and delicate-looking master Benjamin? But when Foster--the tiny temple of dominance wielding a crop--heads toward Benjamin, he might get what he’s always wanted, just in time for Solstice.

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Again, please keep in mind: this blog is only one viewpoint.

Always seek your own truth.

Davey Wavey In Drag

Enjoy....
Hugs, Z.

For The Love of Rock Stars

 I love rock stars. It’s no secret. I have two different series (The Dark Angels & Made in China) and now Rocking Thin Ice. There’s just something about a person who has the courage to stand in front of a crowd and sing out my feelings. Of course, add the cool/bad guy appeal and well, you’re in my happy place.

One of my gateways into M/M romance was a rock star story. It was perfectly imperfect and threw me down the path of lustful adoration. When I was in China, I spent hours (days… okay weeks… months)  watching the Adam Lambert tour cross the USA.

I was fascinated by I could tell how homophobic the state they were performing in was by how they handled the song Fever. Did Adam Lambert and Tommy Ratcliff kiss? Did they makeout? How much did they play with each other? The tour embarked on their overseas tour and I followed it again. That song was still a good predictor of homophobia but when they headed to Malaysia and people protested because they were afraid he’d make their kids gay. I decided I had to start sharing my work.

The music industry is far from tolerant when it comes LGBTQIA people. Though as we’ve seen in the last few years more out rainbow people. Lil Nas X, who is openly gay is the rap star who went country and just won Song of the Year at the MTV Video Music.

I believe music can help people bridge gaps... therefore books about musicians can really get the job done! 

Rocking Thin Ice came to be because I was enthralled with a Johnny Weir video where he skates to Lady Gaga in an exhibition. He’s all defiant and sexy… just by showing the world exactly who he is he fights and wins a war.

Blaze Parker from Rocking Thin Ice skates to music that sends messages to the judges, audiences, and the world. I struggled with who could balance and appreciate all that my skater is and wants to become… A rock star stood up for the challenge.

Drake Keys is super laid back. He likes girls, guys, and guitars. No biggie as long as everyone is happy… until the band’s homophobic manager dismisses him. He finally decides to see Blaze Parker skate live. He decides attending a skating event wasn’t stalking even if you had been crushing on the guy since you were a teenager.

Blaze doesn’t do relationships longer than twenty minutes so his decision to take a very high guitar player home was more about responsibility than spending time with a hot guy. His brother is joking about Blaze and Drake’s wedding on their first official date could easily be ignored, but even his dog (who takes the world on teeth first) loves Drake. It’s a conspiracy! But not a bad one.

 

Amazon

Rocking Thin Ice’s blurb

Can a sexy rock star show a relationship-phobic ice skater that there’s more to life than gold medals?  

When ice-skating’s bad boy Blaze first glimpses Drake, every fantasy he’s ever had flares to life. Not only is rock star Drake sexy as sin, his songs awaken a longing in Blaze that he’s denied for years. But Blaze Parker doesn’t believe in relationships—at least not those that last more than twenty minutes. 

Drake Keys has dreamed about the sensual ice skater for years. When Drake is kicked out of his band because of his bisexuality, he drives across the country to finally see the man he’s had a crush on skate live.   

Though the attraction is instant and intense, both Blaze and Drake have baggage that puts any relationship on thin ice. Blaze is driven by a long-ago betrayal to prove himself a champion, and Drake, uncertain about the future, hopes to resurrect his music career. As they take a road trip together, Drake romances Blaze, hoping to melt his heart and show him that love is possible… but not without some tough decisions.

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