Thursday, August 29, 2019

Original plot bunny of Rocking Thin Ice


I was raised in Upstate New York and learned to skate when I was two years old. I loved the freedom that gliding over the ice gave me. Though I never had any formal training, I can skate backwards, and I used to be able to do some simple jumps. When I received the contract for Rocking Thin Ice I announced it while skating.

Origin story of my Olympic skater Blaze Parker:
A few years ago, two wonderful friends on Facebook kept tagging me in ice-skating videos. The talent, the grace… those asses! The plot bunny for Rocking Thin Ice hopped in my bunny hutch while I watched Johnny Weir doing an exhibition skate on YouTube to a Lady Gaga song. His presentation and artistry forced my hand, and I started taking notes on Blaze Parker—who would become the main character in Rocking Thin Ice.



Blaze was talented and sexy, but he’d been betrayed by another skater he had a crush on. He responded by working harder and longer than any other skater. Blaze only had time in his life for his brother, his dog, and skating. There were phone apps if he needed to get laid, relationships were not necessary.

Olympian Blaze Parker doesn't do relationship longer than twenty minutes until he brings home rock star Drake Keys….

I was on a roll with him and just as I figured out who the other main character would be the anime Yuri On Ice came out.

Sigh…

Don’t get me wrong I adore Yuri On Ice. Yurio is my angry little potato chip and he rocks! I also respect how Yuri On Ice changed anime forever. Though I didn’t want it to seem like I was copying so I put my badass skater on hold for about two years.

Finally, I couldn’t wait to write Blaze and Drake any longer and the story poured out of me.

When Adam Rippon came out as the first openly gay figure skater going to the Olympics, I applauded him and I was well into my third draft. Nothing was going to stop me from sharing this story.

There was some worry that I had embellished the homophobia too much. How could a sport like men’s ice skating be homophobic? (I guess to some it feels welcoming with the sequins and pastel? Stereotype much?)

But then Adam Rippon shared his story of how he was afraid of being “too gay” to skate. His coaches told him to butch it up. So unfortunately, Blaze’s experiences in Rocking Thin Ice echoes what skaters have experienced in real life. Maybe that will start changing but for right now, the fact that Adam Rippon was the first openly gay skater to be out during Olympic competition tells us we have much further to go on the road equality and acceptance.

Here’s an excerpt during Blaze’s competition:

He stepped onto the ice and felt everything start to change.
Across the rink, Blaze felt emboldened by his fury, which funneled into determination, and he inhaled the brisk air laced with popcorn, soda, and the smell of possibility. This was destiny.
He stretched his arms out and did a slow circle on the ice. Luke and Anna always teased him that he marked his territory the same way his puppy did. In a way, he did. He swayed his hips to skate to the middle of the ice, giving the crowd languid movements to refocus all their attention onto him.
Once in the center, he spun to a stop and went into a stance with hands behind his back. The audience hushed.
Every second he was on the ice had been a fight, and everything boiled down to these moments of battle. Like all athletes, he fought his body to push past limitations, and he usually won the daily battle. The fight against expectations wasn’t always an easy win.
Not even “butching it up,” as his first coach recommended, had worked, because his delicate, more feminine, features weren’t something he could change. The fact misogyny is one of the factors that contribute to homophobia hadn’t been lost on him, but instead of addressing it head-on, he fought the ugliness by not giving people the opportunity to invalidate him.
The throbbing guitar of “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” blared over the ice, filling him. Pat Benatar’s song had become his theme song through the years, and a dare to the Skating Federation. However, when you issued this kind of invitation, you had to back that with skill and perfection.
He might look breakable, but he’d show the audience his core had been forged of titanium from the hell he’d gone through. The song got everyone clapping while he danced into his first quad and then his second. The driving ’80s backbeat fit his jump-heavy program.
The lyrics of the song fed his intentions. He’d dealt with feeling like a loser for too long, and he was done. The time had come to retrieve what Trent had taken from him.
Hard-rocking lyrics demanded he take back his power as he soared over the ice and into a triple. So, unless Trent had left every bit of himself on the ice… this competition would be Blaze’s. No one and nothing would take this away from him.
He lost himself in the music, moving his body and allowing muscle memory to take over. The culmination of years filled with hurt and anger morphed into triple axels and lutzes that would ensure his victory.
Winning this competition and dealing with Trent would finally allow him to break free of the chains that had kept him bound to his past mortification and feelings of unworthiness. He’d be able to move beyond Trent and stupid decisions—although Anna would point out, not if Blaze kept making dumbass decisions.
What was I thinking with this bet?
Focus!
At the halfway point, Benatar’s fighting words transmuted into the slower “We Are the Champions” by Queen. Blaze needed to live the music. The transition worked and allowed him a few seconds to breathe. He skated by the judges mentally, singing how he had paid his dues….
Fuck. He gave more than his fair share. The judges, in turn, lowered his score whenever they could get away with the travesty, even the ones not from openly homophobic countries. It was the reason he’d worked incredibly hard to seek perfection, because anything else wouldn’t count.
The pinging keys of the piano echoed through the rink, paving the way for some intricate footwork. Queen’s music allowed him to use his more feminine movements as a foil, making his next set of jumps seem that much more unexpected and powerful. He’d fuck expectations of the feminine being weak as often as he could.
Freddie Mercury sang how he’d committed no crime. Blaze gained speed, thinking about his biggest mistake. How many times would he be punished for simply giving head to someone he’d liked?
Fury at needing to prove he wasn’t the hurt kid they’d tried to shame out of competition attempted to invade him. He crushed the emotions and accessed the control that drove him forward.
The music ramped to a climax, and all the way, Blaze did lutzes, salchows, toe loops, triple axels, and ended in a motherfucking quad. All in the second half of the program… because he could.
The crowd lost their minds and screamed for him. When Freddie sang about taking bows, Blaze glided past the judges, showing them more respect than most of them ever showed him.
If the closed-circuit TV got a close-up of his face, surely the irony at the lyrics he skated to could easily be read in his expression. But like the song, he would keep fighting well past the end.
Exhaustion caught him, but he nailed the last two jumps ’cause he was a goddamnned fucking champion and no one would take that from him.
Final spin, ending in Freddie Mercury’s victorious pose with fist raised, and done.
A sea of dragons rained down on the ice around him as he desperately sought air. Familiar tears slipped down his face as the plushies made the loss of his parents surface. His mom and dad hadn’t been there when he’d claimed his silver medal at the Olympics, and they wouldn’t be there in physical body this time either when he hopefully took home the gold. He scooped up one of the plush dragons closest to him and hugged the little plushie. Once again, he was reminded that death didn’t end a relationship… death only changed it.
He took a lap to blow kisses to the audience and clapped for their appreciation and support of him. Gratitude for them being there for him—even if the skating community wasn’t always in his corner—never failed to close his throat with emotion.

Blaze Parker had a tough time but his fans and his love for the sport got him through. I thank you for reading romance, and those who gifted me with the plot bunny that did a backflip into Rocking Thin Ice.

Here’s Rocking Thin Ice’s Blurb:
Can a sexy rock star show a relationship-phobic ice skater that there’s more to life than gold medals?  

When ice-skating’s bad boy Blaze first glimpses Drake, every fantasy he’s ever had flares to life. Not only is rock star Drake sexy as sin, his songs awaken a longing in Blaze that he’s denied for years. But Blaze Parker doesn’t believe in relationships—at least not those that last more than twenty minutes. 

Drake Keys has dreamed about the sensual ice skater for years. When Drake is kicked out of his band because of his bisexuality, he drives across the country to finally see the man he’s had a crush on skate live.   

Though the attraction is instant and intense, both Blaze and Drake have baggage that puts any relationship on thin ice. Blaze is driven by a long-ago betrayal to prove himself a champion, and Drake, uncertain about the future, hopes to resurrect his music career. As they take a road trip together, Drake romances Blaze, hoping to melt his heart and show him that love is possible… but not without some tough decisions.


BUY LINKS
Dreamspinner


Big hugs, Z.

Make sure you check me out! 

Facebook: Z Allora Allora and join Z.’s Yaoified Love group (for fun, character chatters, giveaways, and silliness)
Website: www.zallorabooks.com
Blog: zallora.blogspot.com
Dreamspinner Press: www.dreamspinnerpress.com/books/z-allora-637-a


Thursday, August 22, 2019

Humiliation


Humiliation

I guess this is on my mind. I'm in edits for The Longest Night.  A solstice BDSM story... humiliation is part of how the two guys like to play. But sometimes one person's humiliation is another's happy place. More on this story in other posts. It should be out toward the end of 2019. But back to humiliation....

Humiliation can be part of BDSM play and usually falls under edgeplay.

The usual Sane, Safe and Consensual rules may not apply because this activity can cause mental anguish and/or can triggering. The humiliation may have some unforeseen impacts.

This means the Dom/Master/Top should do more of a RACK assessment (risk-aware consensual kink) to mitigate the unintended consequences of this activity. Humiliation (by its very nature) is a potentially damaging activity which is why care should be taken.

Those in charge of the scene need to negotiate the scope of the humiliation with the submissive. Where are the limits, soft spots, and deliciousness so the Master/Dom/Top knows how to proceed.

They need to determine: What’s hot? What’s not? What harms and what doesn’t even register.

Dom/Master/Tops need to be mindful of past traumas experienced by the sub and how it is connected to the humiliation. Self-esteem issues in to be considered.

Talking with the sub is key to understanding how best to make humiliation work for them and to achieve the desired goal. 

Why Would Anyone Want to be Humiliated?
I hear the question without even you asking it because usually in day-to-day life that’s something most people avoid.

Though there are people in the world that have a deep desire to be made to feel embarrassed (humiliated) or even to be dehumanized (treated like an inanimate object or animal). The same parts of the brain that are affected by physical pain are stimulation by humiliation. If physical pain excites the sub, humiliation might also have the same effect.

Like much of BDSM activities, humiliation is about pushing your limits. In some cases, you are taking the power of the action (humiliation) back. Owning the humiliation and turning it into a more positive energy can empower the sub.

Humiliation can put the sub in an extremely submissive position. The Dom/Master/Top doing this humiliating thing to the sub/slave/bottom gives them the pleasure of being “put in their place” so they can worship their Master/Dom/Top better. It’s a mind fuck.

With the power we exchange in BDSM is about trusting someone to do something humiliating to them and then bringing them though the other side where we are stronger for having gone through it.

Some people just get off on mental pain.

It’s freeing to do some of the role playing. Things that you would never want to be called outside a scene could light your hidden fires.

During the power exchange with the Master/Dom they can get that need met in a “safe” way.
Exploring in a safe contained environment can be healing and empowering.


Some examples of Humiliation

Verbal
Using words as insults, name calling, ridiculing the sub, forcing the sub to say things that may not be true (forced flattery) or things they don’t want to admit, mockery, public scolding or belittling.

At a BDSM club, I witnessed a sub being told he had a tiny dick. His Mistress started off whispering to him, then to others. Then she started laughing at him. She berated him for his little cock and told him how it was too small to satisfy anyone.

Based on his blush, and demeanor (head down unable to meet anyone’s gaze, etc.) he was totally humiliated in front of the small group of people watching him.

He had an erection as he apologized for his “tiny” (appearing quite averaged sized) penis. (He didn’t cry but it was a possibly.)

The sub was able to explore being ridiculed in a contained environment about something that (maybe) was worrying/upsetting for him in a safe way, and while it made him embarrassed it also got him off. He faced his fear, and afterwards he seemed happier.


Physical
Some examples of physical humiliation: spitting, golden showers (urinating on the person), ejaculating on sub’s body/face, forced penetration, micro-management (needing permission to use the bathroom, eat, anything), kneeling, collar and leash, body worship, or having your hair cut.


As always humiliation is very individualized to the sub. Keep in mind what might be humiliating to one sub might not even register as discomfort for another.

I spoke to someone about golden showers and for him, it had nothing to do with humiliation for him it was receiving something from the man’s body. It was joyous and made him happy. Someone else would find that degrading.

Here’s a video I thought was pretty good.
https://sexpositivepsych.com/humiliation-play


Always seek your own truth.

I’d love to hear from you so comment here or use the contact information to touch base with me privately.

Many hugs,
Z. Allora

Thursday, August 15, 2019

Best Writing Advice

I adore watching this vlogger, Jenna Moreci.

She's cracks me up and gives wonderful advice on writing.

Enjoy!

Thursday, August 1, 2019